When you two first met, you thought it was love at first sight. Everything just seemed to click, like you were two fitting pieces of a puzzle. You started dating, and oh! It was a beautiful time of your life.
You would look deep into his or her eyes and think, “I never want to lose this human.
When he proposed, it was like the stars had aligned and your life was about to begin for real. The wedding happened, it was the first day of the rest of your life.
You looked so beautiful that he shed a few teardrops at your mere sight in that dress.
You even wrote your vows yourself because no one else understood how you felt better than you, and you needed the love of your life to understand it, too.
The Honeymoon Was Exquisite!
The romance was better than the ones you saw in movies. You were sure you had made a good choice and would live happily ever after.
Today, the story has changed. All the butterflies you used to have in your belly have turned into worms, and you get furious whenever you remember you married this person. You think it’s time you pulled out of this sorry excuse for a marriage.
What Happened? What Went Wrong and Where?
In today’s world, the “till death do us part” phrase in the wedding vows has become a cliché. People say the promises but do not live by them anymore.
Every young person wants to get married at some point in their lives. The ladies can’t wait for the guy in their lives to pop the question.
Whenever a man tries to bend over and tie his shoelaces, the ladies assume he is about to get down on one knee and ask the big “Will you marry me?” question.
It is beautiful to want someone you can love for the rest of your life and raise a family with.
But are you prepared for what’s ahead of you? Realistically, people receive more training for a career than marriage.
Nobody trains people for matrimony anymore because the world expects you to figure it out independently.
Various authors have indeed written books that claim to help people get through marriage like it’s as easy as walking through a door, but despite the number of people patronizing these authors, the rate of divorce around the world keeps increasing.
Marriage counselors are almost getting tired of their jobs because people go to them to find solutions to their marriage problems, but after everything, they end it.
The rate of divorce in the United States of America is very high, but interestingly, it is worse in Europe.
Research on divorce as of the year 2014 showed the rate of divorce in these eight countries as follows:
- United States of America: 53%
- Spain: Above 60%
- Portugal: Above 60%
- Czech Republic: Above 60%
- Luxembourg: Above 60%
- Hungary: Above 60%
- Belgians: 70%
- Chile: 3%
That’s not good news for the sacred institution called marriage. Marriage in itself is not a bad thing; people only get it wrong because most people get married for the wrong reasons or just to experience what it feels like to have a wedding.
What Are Some Common Causes of Divorce?
Infidelity
This is the number one shipwrecker when it comes to marriage. Most times, we wonder why people have extramarital affairs, but the answers we get are never the same.
People cheat for different reasons, and sometimes they do so unintentionally.
Cheating sometimes starts with a pure friendship with people you want to talk to or see as a shoulder to lean on when you have problems with your spouse.
Sometimes, people cheat because they have over-the-roof sexual desires that they feel their partners may not want to satisfy.
But still, none of these reasons is good enough for a person to cheat. That is why there is a need for emotional intimacy between married people.
Inadequate or Lack of Communication
Every relationship needs clear communication to function correctly and effectively.
When couples cannot communicate using proper words or do not communicate at all, a lot of negative energies begin to pile up inside, and sooner or later, that power is going to burst out into something disastrous.
Using abusive language in conversations with your partner or even yelling at them could lead to resentment and make them a ticking time bomb waiting patiently to explode at the right time.
Sometimes, people say things they do not mean when upset, but fighting and making up almost daily only means your marriage is headed for a rocky road.
Always Being Correct
This is a severe problem. When one partner always feels correct and never allows the other person to have an opinion on issues regarding their marriage, kids, or anything else, there is bound to be some friction.
No human being is 100% correct all the time. When a partner’s opinion is trashed, they feel less important and belittled.
Sometimes, the partner whose opinion never counts could give up on trying to say things when needed.
Domestic Violence
When people get angry, they are tempted to do and say all manner of things, but there is a limit to what they should do when they are mad.
Controlling their anger could prevent many unfortunate occurrences, like the loss of lives and properties.
People think of men beating up their wives when they hear domestic violence, but it goes beyond that.
Emotional abuse also counts as domestic violence, and women can also be guilty of emotional abuse.
However, no matter what the disagreement between a couple might be, it should never result in getting physically abusive to your partner.
Money
Yes, money does crazy things to people. Sometimes, people say love is enough, but money makes love enough.
When there is insufficient money to keep the family running or when one partner earns more than the other, some playful attitude might appear.
The most common money problem in relationships, however, is spending habits.
When one partner spends too much on irrelevant things or spends above the monthly budget, it can become frustrating for the other.
Spending moderately, especially when the couple isn’t financially buoyant, has helped couples avoid financial problems.
These are some possible causes of divorce. Many more reasons marriages fail, and most causes of marriage failures are avoidable.
