The statements below are some of the most popular quotes on “respect.”
“Knowledge will give you power, but character gives respect.”
Bruce Lee
“Respect yourself and others will respect you.”
Confucius
In today’s world, respect is slowly reducing as the days go by. People are gradually obsessed with themselves and unsympathetic to those around them. Consequentially, there’s a disregard for people’s rights and feelings.
“Yes, Sir” and “No, Ma’am were part of what we had to learn. I grew up learning 5 magic words, or let me say courtesy words, and these words are:
- Please
- Excuse me
- Sorry
- Thank you
- Pardon me
Sometimes, we never understood why we were taught such things and other times; we were forced to do and say such things. Now, we truly appreciate it.
What is Respect?
According to Merriam-Webster (2017), respect, or esteem, is a positive feeling or action toward someone or something considered important or held in high esteem or regard.
It conveys a sense of admiration for good or valuable qualities. It is also the process of honoring someone by exhibiting care, concern, or consideration for their needs or feelings.
Respect also means to serve and give back. Serving shows that we care and respect. It bestows honor, regard, and value on a person, his words, and actions.
Learning respect starts early and continues to develop as we socialize. When we disagree with a person, we listen and remain patient with them.
Some show respect using courtesies like “Thank you ” in the West or “Namaste ” in the Indian subcontinent or simple expressions like a bow, a smile, direct eye contact, or a simple handshake.
Why is Respect so important?
Respect is important because It is the glue that holds your relationships together. It’s a direct way of preserving human dignity and value. People are highly esteemed because of their knowledge, character, and integrity.
Sometimes, we respect their position. No one wants to be treated like trash, so the call to respect one another must be heeded.
Respect has its roots and core values in the culture of any society. As we are all distinct and different beings, so are our respect etiquette.
However, those acts may have very different interpretations depending on the cultural context. Here are a few societies explained.
Asian Cultures
Respect is based on the family and demonstrated through language and gestures.
In places like China, it is very rude to call someone by their first name, except if you are familiar with the person and have known them for a long time.
Asian cultures address each other by their titles when they are at work. Also, individuals often address their friends as juniors and seniors, even if they are just a few months younger or older.
In Asian culture, bowing is a sign of respect for elders and ancestors. Many codes of behavior revolve around young people showing respect to older people.
Like in many cultures, you let them speak first, sit down after them, and not contradict them.
Sometimes, when an older person enters a room, everyone stands. People are often introduced from oldest to youngest.
Younger people often go out of their way to open doors for their elders and not cross their legs in front of them.
Islamic Cultures
Around the world, there are many ways to show respect to people. For example, kissing the hands of parents, grandparents, and teachers is recommended.
Wives are taught to respect their husbands by being totally submissive to them. The Islamic ethic is based on the Koran and good character.
African Cultures
The African culture of respect is deep and strongly rooted in their norms. Here are a few compilations of general gestures.
- For the Asians, the elders are always acknowledged. In the case of serving the elders first during mealtimes.
- Thou shall not point thy fingers. I grew up with my mum hitting my hands when I was raised to show my interest in a certain toy or food. She would say, “Don’t point your fingers at someone’s market.” The market here means business. Pointing at something or someone with the index finger is considered rude. Where words fail us to express properly, we normally move our chin in the right direction and widen our eyes towards the object of our focus.
- The use of the right hand. This goes well, especially during mealtimes or when giving someone something. Even those sinister (left-handed) are trained to use their right hand for almost everything. Better still, receive a Gift with both hands. It’s a non-verbal way to show extreme thankfulness with both hands outstretched.
- Name Calling: In Nigeria, anyone older than you must not be addressed with their first name or without their full title. Better yet, you can add the terms “aunty, “uncle,” “mummy,” or “daddy,” whether or not they are related to you by blood.
Religion
In my faith, respect for God is Paramount. Chewing gums while service is on is a big NO NO, or probably your phone rings out loud while preaching the word, which is disrespectful.
In many respects, it involves Kowtowing (kneeling and bowing). It is a practice of honor during worship at temples. Some Juju priests believe you mustn’t come empty-handed while coming to a shrine. You must offer sacrifices/gifts to their gods.
Sacred materials such as the Koran and Bible are regarded as holy.
Business
Respect is an essential element in business and life. For a successful business, you need to have respect because it is an essential qualification for a successful career.
It should increase as you progress through various stages of leadership and responsibility. In the business view, respect must be earned.
Respect in business relationships builds feelings of trust, safety, and well-being. It involves integrity in keeping to business deals, being mindful of other people’s time, and being courteous in words and deeds. Not only should superiors be respected, but subordinates and colleagues, too.
Let’s look at a case scenario: What to do when somebody disrespects you.
You’re probably walking along an aisle when someone mistakenly bumps into you with a cup of juice! Haa, boom!?!?? Your dress is spilled with stains, and all the confusion sets in.
The person at fault starts yanking out hurtful words with a rising tone, insinuating that it’s your fault while it isn’t. You might be wondering how to respond—or if you should respond! How many of us are willing to let go and walk away?
Well, some might overlook and decide to walk away, while most of us, before walking away, would have lavishly engaged in verbal or physical abuse.
Yes, you have every reason to be upset, but how do you confront such situations yet still preserve a person’s dignity and respect?
Below are a few steps. It should be noted that the steps are for general use.
For a Stranger
First impressions really matter, and you might meet again sometime in life. You don’t want it to be awkward. It’s a small world, you know.
- Don’t yell or talk over the top of each other
- Try to understand their point of view
- If it’s something you can easily let it slide, please do let it go. For a more delicate situation, respond with caution and control your temper. You can engage in a bargain.
- Even while the person might still be disrespectful, maintain your composure. We might all be tempted to lash out since it’s a one-off, but be disciplined enough to maintain your composure.
- Lastly, still try to understand the person. Kindly explain to the person your view. If the person doesn’t agree, walk away.
For a Close Contact
It’s ok to end friendships with people when it’s detrimental, but hey!! let’s get through this together before you cut down that line:
- Ask yourself: Is this behavior a consistent pattern or a one-off event? Think through whether it was directed to you personally or at the event.
- Put yourself in his/her shoes: People go through a lot of bad stuff that they bottle up all day and night. Be sure to consider what the disrespectful person might be going through or the causes of their actions. You might do worse if it were you.
- Assess your reaction: Are you justifiable in your response to the scenario? Was the response worth it?
- Preferably, have the conversation privately instead of causing a scene in public.
- And if you have an issue with you keeping your temper, always take a break. Come back after you have cooled down instead of confronting someone in the heat of the moment and saying hurting and irreversible words.
- Use terms like “I feel” and “I think” instead of “You always…” That is to say, never get personal.
- Keep yourself calm; make great efforts not to get upset and sometimes defensive.
- Give that person a chance to change their behavior towards you.
- Set clear and enforceable boundaries.
- Treat others how you want to be treated. Remember that you can show people what respect truly means by respecting yourself.
Conclusion
Respect is very important. There is this good feeling you get when someone gives you respect. And respect should be reciprocated. Give respect to whom respect is due, and do not let anyone make you lose the respect you deserve.
